A Fine January Mourning

A reflection on the loss of a loved one.

Watercolour.
18x8 in.

Politics

I had a friend tell me that she was fed up with people telling others what they should or should not believe. I am too. So first things first, this is just my beliefe, I have been wrong before.

I was challenged by a friend recently (although probably not intentionally) about my political beliefs. She said something to the effect of "Your political views are all over the place." And she was right. I was challenged and bummed because I did not know how to explain why that was. As if I had not thought it out before. So I did just that.

Today I think "Christians" are confused about their patriotism and political beliefs and how those coincide with their religious views. I often hear that "Christians" are supposed to be of a specific political conviction (I will not call any names here). I think we might be confused though. Should we not be christian before we are republican or democrat, or even american? I believe that I think the way I do because I dont want to be any of those things. So many times I hear explain how they are conflicted over things like abortion. Im american and I believe we have the right, but im a christian and I think it is wrong. Why are we having this debate? Did Christ ever say he was conflicted between his political beliefs and his way of life?

I think christianity (cheesy though it may sound) is its own affiliation. It is when we start to look like the rest of the world that we may need to take a second look at the way we think.

Poo.

A few days ago I had jury duty. Call me bitter but I do not feel like I owe anything to the government. Especially not the legal system. That is not what I wanted to talk about though. The funny thing about jury duty is that you are giving yourself to the government essentially. The badge actually says "This Badge and badge holder are property of the Department of Justice of California." You can imagine the irony, a Native being the "property" of anything, especially the "justice system." You try and tell any Native he or she is the property of anything much less the united states and see what happens. I laughed it off. But then you can imagine the irony when a mexican man sits next to a white woman in this crowded room, who literally mumbles "ew," and then removes herself from her seat and stands. This was not funny too me. Then, as the crowd of potential jurors dwindles a more hilarious scene presents itself. Left in the room are all hispanic people, most of which im sure speak spanish. On the screen is the food channel. Much to my amusement there is a white lady teaching this room full of hispanics to make a wonderful salsa using, not 3, not 2, not 1, but ZERO chilis! And just as my name is called I have a sudden urge to use the restroom. Now that's what I call civil DUTY.

Savage

The indians gathered
ciricle around the fire
dance until hearts are content and feathers are ruffled.

The Great Father can see this
He smiles.

The indians call to the sky
brightly colored face paint to match
the colors of the clouds.

The Great Father can see this
He smiles.

The indians tell stories of how
the Great Father saved them
from generation to generation.

Oh but now, not now.
I am not indian, we are not indian.
There are no more indians.

Perhaps the Great Father closed His eyes
just for one second.

And the indians were gone.

Mostly I just think the Great Father weeps
for the lost children skin and blood red as the sunset sky.

A Couple of things. (not really)

Thing number one. I had a conversation with an atheist recently. He was all pissed off that christians could believe in a God that could allow so much harm to come to the world when He is fully capable of stopping it. The "free-will" argument has been long washed up in the minds of athiests so I put it this way. I had a rough upbringing by many standards. In fact my father-in-law brought it to my attention that we have seen more tragedy in my 24 years that he has seen in his lifetime. That was my life though. Never did I think that the God that I believe in was responsible. In fact I blame it on my own actions and the actions of those around me. This is a common misconception of God by christians and non-christians alike. As if God should be some cosmic superhero saving the world by striking down the bad guys and smiting those of us who stray. In fact it is my own belief that it is irresponsible of christians and even athiests to put the blame on God for our actions and those of others. I've been wrong before.

Thing number two. This one will have to wait. As I sit here trying to think of how to write it out I'm so heated that it might just sound like an anrgy rant. Dang.

I hear them all.

I have been writing some music and I hope to post some of it soon. As for now here is some of my inspiration as well as a song that reflects my recent mood. Enjoy.

For Example

I talked about this in my last blog. Now it is in the paper, the perfect example. Read this.


http://www.visaliatimesdelta.com/article/20091014/NEWS01/910140307/Parolees-say-they-were-directed-to-homeless-encampment-by-their-parole-officers&referrer=FRONTPAGECAROUSEL